Joint epiphanies
Fifteen years ago i used to do this regularly, like clockwork. I conducted
teacher training sessions for Unitarian Universalist sunday school
teachers. They were successful and somehow I had agreed to do it again.
But I had done it so many times it seemed like it would be easy. I knew
the general subject area I wanted to cover; developmental theories. Great.
Another woman was involved. Since my new way of life is to dance and wait
for an epiphany, I just danced and waited for an epiphany that didn't seem
to come. This event had a deadline and required planning and structure
beyond the intuitive leadership i've practiced in my dance teaching. I
waited. The time drew dangerously close and I had no plan. There seemed
to be no opportunity to get together with my co-presenter to plan the
session. I realized that my standards are different now. I can't teach
something from the surface, from understanding it conceptually and
intellectually. I must come from the experiential. I can't just "tell"
what i "know". Now i must come out of a deep well of experience. But i
did have pretty deep experience in this subject. I just couldn't remember
it all. I despaired and thought maybe i was no longer capable of designing
and producing such sessions. It was then that i realized that joint
epiphanies are rare. And they are probably rarer when it is over phone or
email. An individual epiphany is a lot more likely. I quickly emailed my
co-teacher and let her know i would do it by myself. And sure enough this
time when i sat down with a pen and paper a reasonable plan came to me. I
was pleased. Now i think joint epiphanies probably happen. But i can't
depend on them yet. My own fireworks, however, deliver like old faithful.